Aides to Sarah Palin condemned HBO’s Game Change as being “sick” and “inaccurate.” The amazing thing is that these aides had not yet seen the movie.  Speculation is rampant as to how these aides knew this. Possible explanations are:

1. It was reported to Fox News, and Fox is “fair” and “balanced,” so Game Change MUST be “sick” and “inaccurate.”

2. Sarah told them it was “sick” and “inaccurate” so it must be true?!

3. The Holy Spirit whispered to them that the movie was “sick” and “inaccurate.”

4. It was not listed in Sarah’s new book “America: Reflections on all things healthy and accurate.”

5.  The aides actually helped HBO make the movie.

Palin’s aides have not been receiving the salaries they would like, so many are moonlighting to make ends meet. Advertising themselves as “clairvoyant” Sarah Palin’s aides are offering such services as:

1. Fortune telling

2. Palm reading

3. Séances

4. Predicting the winner of the NBA playoffs

5. Predicting the winner of the 2012 World Series

6. Selecting the best performing stocks for 2012

7. Identifying the GOP nominee for 2012

8. Predicting which Palin will get pregnant next

9. Disclosing the true mother of Trig

10. Explaining why Bristol’s child shares a name with the woman Todd paid for sex.

11. Identifying the part of Bristol’s anatomy which will be re-aligned next.

12. Identifying the type of animal Sarah will be credited with killing in the summer of 2012.

13. Identifying the type of gun Trig will get on his fifth birthday.

14. Disclosing the age Trig will be when Sarah sends him to live in a home.

15. Disclosing if Track really married the mother of his child.

16. Identifying the targets of Diana’s next burglaries.

17. Revealing the next job of Dave Parker of the Anchorage Police Department

18. Revealing the location or disposition of the “evidence seized” in the Shailey Tripp matter.

19. Identifying the number of days Sarah would serve as President, before quitting, if she were elected.

20. Identifying the third department of Government Rick Perry would have cut if he had been elected.

21. Revealing if Rick Santorum is really gay.

22. Identifying how many items of jewelry Callista Gingrich will receive from Newt before they move to the moon.

23. Identifying the first country to set off a nuclear bomb if Ron Paul is elected and closes all military bases in foreign countries.

24. Providing a list of all the women Herman Cain will harass in the future.

25. Providing a list of the number of abortions performed by Mrs. Santorum’s ex.

26. Disclosing the color of the next sweater vest of Rick Santorum.

27. Identifying the cure for cancer.